When You Think You Have No One - Be Grateful

My great aunt Bruna died last week. She was the most vibrant, alert, HILARIOUS 100 year old I have ever known. She told the greatest stories and had me in stitches during the handful of times I saw her as an adult.

When I was a child, she was a typical old lady relative - awkward hugs, wet kisses, the ever faithful 20 dollars in the birthday card every year, always accidentally calling me by my sister's name at family get togethers.

As an adult, I saw her differently - someone who was not a burden to visit with in the least. Someone who was wise and had a lot to teach me. Someone who embodied my Italian heritage and who I hoped would live to be 200. On every lazy weekend we had this summer, I said to myself - we really should take the baby up to the city to see Auntie this weekend. But ah well, there is always next weekend.

Only there wasn't.

I never told her how fabulous she was at 90. I never told her how fantastic she was at 100. But she was the first relative I hoped would RSVP to my wedding, and I always asked my mom if she would be coming down with the other Italians for our sporatic tradition of cold cuts, baked ziti and yelling at my father.

Before she passed, she told my cousin that she didn't want to have a funeral because she didn't have anybody left.

Wait hang on a second, excuse me? You don't have anybody left? But you are hilarious, bright, witty and vibrant. And above all else, you are on a hand bell team! If hand bells is anything like dance, you should feel awesome, alive and full of social camaraderie after a good round of hand bell playing.....

But again - I never expressed to her how fabulous I thought she was. And now I am wondering if anybody did, or if they just assumed she knew?

My sister said it best on her facebook:

Rebecca Hassinger R.I.P. Auntie Bruna. You said you didn't have anybody. You were wrong.

She had a lot of fans. And now she'll never know.

This is just another addition to a long line of reminders that we should always tell the people in our lives how much we love them. I wasn't particularly close to auntie - I saw her maybe seven times in adulthood - but next time it might be someone i AM close to - my sister, a best friend, my mother, my child.....and I would never want them to have the burden of saying they didn't have anybody.

During a leadership meeting at dance, one of the teens mentioned how she has a paper heart I gave her at a rehearsal three years ago taped to her bathroom mirror. She sees the encouragement on it every day and she doesn't take it down. Other girls jumped in with little trinkets and gifts I had brought in for the dancers and they have kept for years with no intention of throwing away. I was awestruck that they had kept these mementos - some of which I don't even recall making.

Never underestimate the power of gratitude.

I tucked a package of thank you notes into my purse today before church. I will work thankfulness into my life more and more.

You never know the difference it might make.

Auntie Bruna did get to meet Sam before she left us. He was far too small to ever remember, but here they are - the year that they turned 1 and 100, respectively.